For SMI (Student Missionary Internship) I have to do a bible study that my church gave my grade. I've already gone through this study but it's making a lot less sense this time around.
First of all there's a story about a pastor in England or something and then questions about the story. The first question asks how this pastor began his search for God's will. The answer was that he tried to only want God's will (perfectly fine answer) and that he made sure he had no will of his own (the stupid answer). Why would a God who gave us free will want us to throw it away. Yeah we should look for Gods will and want to do it but I don't believe that we should have no will of our own. If we have no will of our own then it isn't our choice to follow God.
I am starting to question a lot about Christianity which really stinks cause if I'm not a Christian I don't know what I would do. I need God because I need to have someone who is always there for me. But some of the stuff in these studies and what people say sounds really weird, like why would God say that. I think I want to read the bible on my own. Like read through the whole thing start to finish. I don't like when people take single verses out of the bible cause it's so much easier to twist the words that way. Sometimes if you just heard the verses before and after a certain verse it would make a lot more sense.
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