Here we go again, so much for that

We arent talking again and if Michael was doing this so that I would blow up and he could call me a bitch like Kim thinks he was then he got his wish cause I got really mad and told him that his excuse of "It just came up" over a text conversation was not good enough. Which its not you had time from when the thought popped into your head to typing it out to pressing send to realize "Hmm, this is what she ask me not to talk about" . . . !!! I dont know what to do anymore.

He Got It!!!!!!

He Got It!!!!!!! :-D Michael finally got it! He text me a few days ago saying that he could talk just as friends if I gave him another chance! I probably looked like an idiot when I read the text cause I was grinning the rest of the day. I don't honestly want to hurt him or not talk to him but I needed to protect myself.
I am so relieved that he got it. I was misrible cause I didn't know what was going on with him and I was worried. Funny thing was I had just put on facebook the night before "How long is too long?" Cause I didn't know how long I should or could ignore his texts.
I'm just ecstatice that he got it!!!!

Things move fast

We're no longer talking . . .

LONG weekend

So this whole boyfriend thing is not going well. I don't remember where I left off last time which couldn't have been more than a week or two ago . . . or three days ago . . . wow this weekend has been Insane with the capitol I. About 12 hours after my last post I had half broken up with Michael. I told him to give me until the next day to decide on keeping dating or just being friends. Friday before noon we were oficially done but still friends.

Between then and saturday night I had cried everytime I talked to him because I feel like crap for dumping him. And saturday night hearing from two of my friends that he was freaking out and said he was contemplating suicide. Fun fun. I call him find out that its not just my fault its also another of his ex's fault. oh goodie. Then I go and have a 2 hour talk with my dad which didn't really help.

Sunday I find out more of what Michael said to my friends . . . not good stuff and I plan to have a conversation with him to tell him that if he cant drop all the talking about us dating then I dont think we can continue being friends. (I know it sounds harsh but from prior experience, if I kept down the same path I would get honestly depressed and that is no good) So he says he can do that so we can stay friends. We go on having another conversation and then in the middle of that he asks if some cetain thing was the reason we broke up . . . Um call me crazy but isnt that something about us dating? Well, the waay he phrased it was a "One last question" type of thing so I'm giving him a second chance and hoping he doesnt screw it up cause I dont know if I'm going to be able to cut all ties with him. if he doesnt.

Oh last comment I especially feel horrible about this cause we had been talking about, early on in the relationship, bad idea, that we could see us together for a long time. Well, I broke up with him the day before our 2 month anniversary . . . yeah real long time.

Stress :-(

Another fun night of my bodys messed up thinking. I'm really stressed so I didn't get to sleep until sometime around 3 am last night. Not as bad as normal but thats probably because I'm too tired from other late nights and early mornings. And more fun added to my normal stress, Dance, school, and friends, I now have a boyfriend(Yay) who I don't know if he's actually doing things that annoy me or if I'm just blaming all of my stress on him.
Before you yell at me, I am glad I have a boyfriend, I'm just going through a normal relationship, sometimes things dont work out. Which I am scared of cause he's really into this and, I dont know, I'm just getting exausted by this and I dont think that my relationship should be making me so tired. I thought it was supposed to make me happy.